contentment contentment contentment

I accidentally have a word of the year. Contentment. I didn't set out to think of a word, but I needed to cheer myself on in a positive direction, and contentment is the word I kept repeating to guide myself to a better place. 

I also have a mantra: focus on the baby's yams. Stay with me while I explain. 

In our family, someone, most often me, will say "look at this baby's yams." And then no one can resist. Naturally, we will gather around saying "oh WOW, look at those yams!" Sometimes 3 or 4 of us will elbow and fight over who is going to relish the yams the most. It's so easy to delight in a baby's chubby legs. I could squeeze them off with joy. They can even melt away the moodiest teenage mood.  

This exercise with the yams is a template for how I want to enjoy the priceless gifts right in front of me. It's how I'm cultivating contentment. Be in the moment. Enjoy what I have. Delight in simple pleasures with gratefulness.

In a big family, heck, in life....there's always a situation, a problem, something unresolved. Sometimes it's heavy and sometimes it's just nagging like a stupid house project. That thing whatever it is can really suck all the joy right out of ya. 

So y'all. Let's focus on the baby's yams this weekend. Breathe some fresh air, smile, have a laugh, sing a hymn. Make a cup of coffee and take it on the porch.

And if you need more motivation on contentment, read the February 16 morning reading from Charles Spurgeon, who is only slightly more eloquent than yours truly. 

plan b meal planning

I think we all know what plan A meal planning is. Make a plan, go to the store, cook your meals. 

My plan A: I plan our meals from Wednesday to Wednesday. I look over my calendar to see if we have any evening events or activities. Then, if I'm good, I will take inventory of my fridge, freezer, and pantry and see what ingredients need to be used. I plan my meals around those ingredients. 

It's a great plan...if I work my plan. But of course it doesn't always happen like that.

So this is my main advice about meal planning: Plan B meal planning. 

Plan B meal planning is my standing plan for when plan A fails. And it most definitely will. 

There's 3 components to a successful plan B. 

1. Keep a stocked pantry.  Instead of focusing on a plan that requires so much discipline, strategic shopping, and cooking, I have shifted my focus to building a stocked pantry and freezer, my own little in house store. This way I have options. I can change as the day changes. I have several "meals" in ingredient form on standby. 

2.  Stock fast foods. Frozen pizzas, Ramen noodles, chicken nuggets. While I know the pitfalls of keeping junk food around, I have found it is preferable to being forced to order take out. 

My logic is if I don't have some super fast, easy button options, I'm going to be forced to go to Little Caesars. Do you know how much it cost my family to eat one meal at the cheapest place to get pizza? Conservatively, $50. Say we do that 3x a month...that's $150. I can buy 5 or 6 large salmon filets at Aldi for that amount. 

So from a standpoint of managing resources, I'm better to stock up on groceries, whether that's salmon or Raman, and own the fact that I am not going to feel like cooking every meal. Also, I need a few meals that the kids can make for themselves.

Having the junk allows for no excuses to go out to eat. Nothing wrong with going out. I love to go out on purpose, just not as a default. Also, meals out are not typically fast or cheap! 

3. Cook efficiently. As much as I can, when I cook, I double or triple recipes. I harness the energy I'm already spending to maximize my efforts. I only do this with the foods we absolutely love. I'm not going to experiment and make a giant West African peanut soup (even though that recipe turned out amazing). Chili, taco meat, spaghetti sauce - all our favorites, I'm going bulk. 

Having leftovers and meals for the freezer is absolutely necessary to managing my time and energy well.

Plan B meal planning is simply making a reliable back up plan because plan A requires more discipline than life allows (at least for me in this season of life). If it's a good week, great! I ride that wave. But if I resort to Plan B, I count that as a win, too.

3 baby items that have stood the test x 5 babies

I'm not a stuff person with babies. Like one of my fellow minimalist mom friends hilariously said, "give me a boob and a diaper and I can take this baby anywhere." My sentiment exactly.

I just had no tolerance for baby carriers, breast pumps, nursing covers, wipe warmers, all the various seats and swings. If I had any of it, I mostly borrowed and rarely used it. I'm not saying this is a moral issue, it was just my preference. 

BUT...there's 3 baby items I really LIKE and that have stood the test x all 5 of my babies over the 13 year age span between my oldest and youngest. I'm attached to these products. I even think these things would be nice for grandparents to have and keep on hand at their house. 

1. The first is the Yookidoo bath toy. These are so fun! It's battery powered and recycles the bath water like a little faucet. You know how babies are mesmerized by the water running and when it's time to turn it off, they stand up in the tub and want to get out. Well, this is the solution. It comes with lots of cups and accessories, and it's just a big ol' hit at our house.

2. The second is the Fisher Price booster seat. Classic. With my first, I bought a charming Jenny Lind high chair, and it bit the dust within 6 months. The wooden tray did not hold up. Plus, it was too big for our tiny house at the time. It was a sad day when I threw it in the burn pile, but that's when I bought the iconic lime green and turquoise booster that has done its job so well. Also, you most likely need a booster to travel anyways, so it's easy to just have one.

3. The third is the Chicco Umbrella stroller. I am such an umbrella stroller enthusiast. I love the Chicco (mine is much older than the one linked) because it's sturdy. It's light weight and small enough to pop it in and out of the trunk of the car while running errands, and it's solid enough to take on an actual walk around the block. It doesn't replace my actually jogging stroller, but like the booster it's easy for travel and day to day use.

So there's my 3. I didn't think I'd still be writing about baby items at 40 years old, but I'm so glad I am! 

What about you parents and grandparents out there? What products do you swear by? 

mentone getaway

Stephen and I drove up to Mentone for the long weekend all by our big boy and big girl selves. No kids! 

Any time I make a plan, book a place, arrange childcare, I feel like a mature, full grown ADULT.

This trip was pure serenity. 

The timing was perfect because I have been slightly broke down with the motherhood. Having a busy 15 month old is kicking my fanny. I had not forgotten what a handful they are at this age, but oh boy, living it day to day is a whole thing. 

You can't get ANYTHING done ever. Ever ever ever ever. 

To step away from my responsibilities for a few days did not hurt my feelings. The older 2 children were on a church trip, and grandparents stepped in to handle the younger 3. Whooo hoo! FREEEEEDOM.

We had the best time -- eating, walking, hiking, and talking.....uninterrupted.

We went to Desoto Falls, 

the Wildflower Cafe, 

...and enjoyed all the scenery, so sparse and wintry.

We went out to lunch both days but made really simple meals at the cabin for breakfast and dinner.

Not spending a bunch of money is one way this trip was extra relaxing. 

We had no hard decisions to make. 

I started a new book. We watched movies. Listened to music.

One thing we did, which we loved, was have some intentional planning, praying, and envisioning meetings. I teased Stephen, calling them "break out sessions." We had a total of three.

The 1st break out was about general things we needed to talk about....a brainstorm.

The 2nd, we went through each kid, discussed goals we had for them, parenting stuff, and practical issues to address.

The 3rd meeting, we mapped out a vision for where we want to be in 1, 5, and 10 years, Lord willing. 

We chatted career, house projects, finances, health goals, teenagers, college, cars, preschool. AAHH! We covered it all.

We found this to be a real time of clarity and aligning our vision and goals as a couple. We agreed that this would be a great practice to revisit every year in January.

Also, 3 nights was the perfect amount of time away, plenty of time to settle in and relax, but not so long that it's hard to reenter reality.

L'Amour Rock, you were so good to us. 

wardrobe contentment + blog recommendation

The phrase "cultivate contentment" has been on my mind lately. I've made it a little mantra I repeat to myself. Especially this time of year, in my wardrobe, I have felt discontent. I'm bored. I want to burn it all down and start over. So I have to tell myself to be content. Be grateful for what I have. Life is not about a perfect wardrobe. No one cares. 

Here's how I comfort myself when my closet feels stale.

1. I take everything out and pretend I'm shopping my own closet. I hang up what I "bought," and make it look pretty like it would look in a store. 

2. I focus on doing a better job with my make up and hair. I'd paint my nails if I didn't have a 15 month old.

3. I plot my next purchase or I buy one item to mix it up, usually a colorful top. Right now I'm really thinking I need some royal blue. 

At least one thing I'm better about now than I used to be is buying more classic pieces that stand the test of time. I purchased this J.Crew Factory city coat over 4 years ago and it's going strong, style wise. One of my best friends saw me wearing it and told me she just ordered the same coat! 

And while I'm on the topic of wardrobe classics, I want to recommend Ann Mashburn's blog, You Need This I Promise. She is a clothing designer and former fashion editor. She writes all about clothes and fashion! I love that she's older because I find that so much style advice is often from 23 year olds. No offense to the young gals, I just love Ann's style wisdom that only comes with years of experience. 

diet veggie soup

Everyone I know wants to lose at least 5 lbs. And often, it is those last 5 lbs, a relatively small amount of weight, that are the hardest to lose. So stubborn! Sure they'd fall off if we starved ourselves, but we know that's not good or realistic. These are a lifestyle change 5 lbs. 

Because I'm not a dieter and I don't swear off certain food groups, my approach is to focus on healthy, sustainable habits. What can I have that would be good for me and help me trim up a bit? See the psychology there? What do I get to enjoy? vs. What do I need to cut out? 

That's where diet veggie soup comes in. I came across this idea in a health magazine a few years ago. They called it diet soup. I will share my recipe, but it's mostly a concept, a formula. 

root vegetables + broth + canned tomatoes + beans + greens

diet veggie soup

extra virgin olive oil

onion diced

2 carrots diced

2 ribs celery diced

1 clove garlic minced

1 can fire roasted tomatoes

2-3 cups broth (chicken or vegetable)

1 cup of cauliflower cut into small pieces

1 can cannelloni beans drained and rinsed

1 large handful spinach chopped

1 teaspoon Italian herbs

salt and pepper to taste

Heat onion, carrots, and celery in oil on medium heat for 7-10 minutes. Add garlic and cook for 1 minute. Pour in broth, tomatoes, beans, cauliflower, herbs, salt and pepper. Allow to simmer for 30 minutes or until carrots and cauliflower are cooked. Add spinach 

Top with a creamy, white cheese of your choice...fresh Mozzarella, feta, goat, or ricotta. Remember this is not about deprivation. Cheese is allowed.

I made this recipe yesterday and it was the most satisfying luxurious lunch for mom on a cold, dreary January day!

home management

Before Jill was born, I started looking more seriously into the topic of home management. I knew I needed to get my act together because unlike several years ago when I had a bunch of babies at home and it was ok for everyone to stay in pajamas all day, now is different. The big kids have commitments and obligations. There's homework, practices, and appointments. My ship (our home) needs to be in working order!

I did a lot of googling and looking for guru's on YouTube, but ultimately landed on this book, Home Management by Kim Brenneman. It's solid gold. Honestly, it's a bit boring at times as a read, but the wisdom she shares is so valuable. My suggestion would be to go through it slowly and chew on it bit by bit. I wish I had this as a younger mom. 

My 2 biggest takeaways:

1. Create a home management binder.  This will hold all the important information you need to reference regularly. Mine has our budget, home repair lists, family meeting notes, and a personal category. It's so great to have everything in one place. Also, this is the place to put all the plans, habits, and details about your days of the week. See below.

2. Create a days of the week schedule. This is mine.

Monday cleaning

Tuesday errands

Wednesday office

Thursday laundry + kitchen

Friday fun! or catch up day

This doesn't mean that I only clean on Mondays or that I do paper work all day Wednesday, it just shows me where to lean in and address issues. It gives each major category a proper day, a time slot to be handled. 

Before this method something like ironing would just dangle out there, a task never to be done, because I hate it. But now, it has a day - Thursday. 

As a homemaker nothing ever feels finished, "a woman's work is never done." This schedule gives me a sense of accomplishment. Whoo hoo! 

I love this paragraph on page 125

God did not create everything in the universe in one day. He took six days to do it in an orderly manner. He divided the creative work among the first six days of the week, focusing on creating specific parts of the universe and specific animal kinds on specific days. Then God rested on the seventh day. He didn't have to do it like this, but he did, and it sets a pattern for us to do the same. Focusing on one area of the home on a weekly basis keeps it under control. We are not so tempted to postpone certain housekeeping tasks forever when we have a day set aside to tackle them specifically. 

Some other tools I use for schedule organization....At a Glance calendar, always, and this Weekly Planner Notepad. 

highlights from 2023

January- was still very much adjusting to life with a new baby and spent lots of long mornings snuggling with Jill. No regrets.

February - made my favorite chocolate cake for Valentine's. Major clean out and decluttering happened.  Tackled the kids artwork. 

March - I turned 40! Huge milestone. I'm middle aged, but having a one year old makes me feel young!

April - Easter with favorite traditions, all day party with friends complete with egg hunt, afternoon group walk, and champagne. 

May - family vacation to Cape San Blas and celebrated our 17th anniversary. 

June - trip to Mentone and camp drop off. 

July- Jill's baptism. Had tons of family in town. So special. 

August - back to school, always bittersweet. 9th, 7th, 5th, and 2nd.

September - enjoyed the last bit of warm weather with boat rides + swimming. 

October - state cross country meet in Huntsville. Stephen Jr. WON his division. 

Laurie beat her personal record. Most memorable day. 

November - Thanksgiving at Lake Chicot + my dad's 70th birthday. 

December - Christmas, Christmas, Christmas. I'm still recovering.

2023 was a good year. It was also a bit of a blur. It was a surviving year. Having children in many ages and stages was the most wonderful challenge. We were up late with teeny boppers and up early with the baby. There was lots of driving. Lots of afternoon cups of coffee. I could barely keep up with the pant needs because these kids keep growing! God used this year to teach me to let things go. He fills in the gaps and things don't need to be perfect.  

I wish you all the happiest New Year!